Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Things I'm Surprised They Haven't Invented Yet

We live in a very modern world full of very awesome technology. I was raised by a tech guy, so we always had the latest and greatest. I specifically remember my dad talking to me about the internet, long before we all had it in our homes and work places. I had not a fat clue what he was talking about, but I remember the discussion. 

Last week, Grant and I had to sign a document for something. We signed it over email by clicking some buttons. A few weeks ago, when I ran the half marathon, my family was able to track me using their phones as it followed a little sticker on the back of my bib as I ran through checkpoints. Amazing technology. 

We had a running family joke for a few years that no longer makes sense. In the early 90's, my family was in the car going somewhere around the holidays, and my sister, Shannon, announced that she would like to hear "My Grown-Up Christmas List" by Amy Grant. My mom leaned forward, pushed a button on the dash of the car and said "Um, excuse me, we'd like to hear My Grown-Up Christmas List." We all laughed hysterically. How silly, to think you could ask your car to play a song for you! This joke is no longer relevant because it is very much an option now.

Just this morning, I was able to say "Play Shake it Off" to my car. And then my car played Shake it Off. I can also push a button and say "Call Jaclyn on cell" and it calls my sister. So yeah, technology is cool. 

I'm also amazed at how convenient things are. When Ellie was a newborn, when I'd go grocery shopping with her, I'd have to place her entire infant carrier in my shopping cart. This left very little room for groceries. It was around that time that I started using Amazon Prime. For the last 2 years, all of our toilet paper, paper towels, trash bags, diapers, and wipes are delivered to my front door. It's one of the greatest decisions I've ever made. I can buy it in bulk and I don't have to put it in my cart or load it in my car. Words can not express how thankful I am for the internet and all that it brings!

However, there are a few things I'm surprised have not been invented yet, or problems that have yet to be solved. 

1. We are still blow drying our hair. This takes a sweet forever. Can't they just come up with some kind of spray or super-towel or something that dries it instantly? I would very much love this. My shower and getting ready routine takes waaay too long. 

2. Child safety seats. Car seats are so, so important but can be a giant pain in the butt. They are expensive, you need a new one for each stage of life it seems, and getting them in and out of cars is annoying. If you need someone else to take your kid somewhere else in their car, it makes more sense to just trade cars rather than switch out the car seat. Ohhh it is SUCH A PAIN. Bulky. Heavy. Hard to deal with. 

I don't really know what I'm even suggesting here, but it would just be a billion dollar idea to find a way to have car seats already in the car somehow, worked into the engineering of the seat. I am not sure how that would work. I'm not an engineer or an inventor or resourceful. Maybe it's impossible. Plus, car seat regulations change all the time. I'm sure by the time I have more children the American Board of Pediatrics will recommend that they stay rear facing till they're 16. 

We once spent over an hour in a rental car lot in Orlando with Grant's parents and a sleepy Ellie as we tried to put a car seat together and it was 149 degrees outside and everyone was in really happy moods. Finally, the rental car company realized they hadn't given us all the pieces to the seat. 

When they realized this, I handled it very well. Except not. 

3. Someone needs to invent something that folds my laundry. Please, I beg of you. 

4. Cold medicine that is safe for babies and young children to take. When Ellie has a cough or a stuffy nose, I can't give her anything. Nothing at all. 

I'm gonna stop you right there. HUSH ABOUT THE OILS. WE ALL KNOW ABOUT THE OILS. I USE OILS. 

I'm a big fan of drugs and I would love to give my child a safe dose of something that will let her sleep and not hack up a lung every 30 seconds. 

5. Can someone please invent a feature that allows you to turn on your car and it is immediately warm? Where you don't have to drive around for a few minutes shivering, with freezing hands, waiting for the heater to get going? 

This post has been brought to you by First World Problems. 

Okay, inventors. Go forth. Invent. You're welcome for the ideas. 


  1. I laughed out ,loud at the oils!

    As for point number 5, lots of cars now allow you to start the engine before getting into the car, and one of the reasons is to warm the car. Luckily in south Texas, the cold isn't bone-penetratingly painful.

    Bee-tee-dub, your car sounds fancy and new-fangled, whereas mine has a 50% chance of the auxiliary cable working...

  2. I give Nate benedryl (he's 3 1/2) and have for some time... my peditrician says it's fine. Just not any sort of decongestant.

  3. Crazy thing...there are automatic car starters. You can buy them for like $200. They have them in North Dakota. I thought it was yet to be invented until I lived here too.

  4. Lol about the oils. I'm right there with you. Did you know if you combine these five oils (that each cost $40 for a very very small bottle), your cold will only last for seven days?

  5. I think most of it is pretty safe... I think they just started pulling back on what they recommend cause people were overdosing their kids. But I know I was given Dimetapp and Benedryl and Robitussin as a child and I turned out alright... kind of ;)