Sunday, October 31, 2010

And You Shall Call Her Lemon Ankle

This weekend was beautiful.




It started with tortilla soup and a slumber party at Liz's house. Her husband was away hunting so the girls came over and cuddled on the couch watching movies and chatting. Liz had never seen "When Harry Met Sally" so I made sure to correct that. Such a classic.

I woke up the next morning to find Liz in her kitchen at 7:15am with what seemed like 5 crockpots full of spaghetti. She was making lunch for her little sister's soccer team. Adorable. We ate coffee cake and drank coffee and chatted until I decided to go home and cuddle with my husband a little bit.

Then we headed out to College Station for the A&M/Texas Tech game. Our friends Matt & Katie were our host and hostess in their awesome season ticket seats. We sat in the shade, in the breeze, AND WE WON. Grant and I have not been to an Aggie game in an embarassingly long time but we had so much fun with them and left there thinking that we need to go alot more often.

And also, I sprained my ankle on the way out.

I am ever so graceful.

The game was over, we were walking out of the stands, I got to the last step on the stairs and I came down on my foot wrong. My ankle rolled, I fell down (I felt SO cool) and then a random stranger girl ran and got security who informed me that some medics were coming to cart me down the stadium.

Um, no.

I wasn't even crying. It can't be that bad. I told everyone to give me about 30 seconds. And then I could walk.

And I did. And I was fine.

And then we got in the car and I pulled off my shoes and saw that my ankle had a tumor the size of a lemon growing out of the side of it.


So today I am gimpy.

I am doing the whole R.I.C.E. thing.

R - Rest - been laying on the couch for FOREVER

I - Ice -- Grant is an Ice NAZI.

C- Compression - my dear husband bought me an ankle brace at the CVS and now I am looking super cool.

E - Elevation - keep the ankle above your heart! I am currently blogging with my foot a good foot and a half higher than the rest of my body.

However, I think we should change that acronym to V.R.I.C.E.

The V stands for Vicodin.

I am irritated and annoyed with myself. But hey, what are you gonna do.

I plan on putting a chair on the front porch and sitting there all night to greet trick-or-treaters. I can't keep getting up to go to the door.

And if I leave the candy-giving responsibility to Grant, he will not do it right. He'll probably just hand out candy and not comment on the costumes or tell all the Ballerinas and Cinderellas and Princesses that they have beautiful shoes and a beautiful tiara.

I may eat some Kit Kat's while I'm out there.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

I Have Blog Problems

In the last 48 hours I have started and deleted no less than 7 blog posts.

I get 3 paragraphs in and then I think to myself, "Self, this is stupid and no one wants to read it. Not even yourself, self".

Sometimes I worry about myself.

So now I'm just typing. Typing aimlessly.

Let's just start with what I've done since I left work:

1. Spent an hour and $63 in the HEB.

2. Finished singing "In My Arms" by Plumb on the radio before I got out of my car. I had a really good harmony that I wanted to sing.

3. Made red beans and rice with sausage.

4. Opened the lid to some "Cornbread Made From Scratch" (that's what it says on the label) that I purchased from the good people at HEB. Usually I make my own cornbread (and by "make my own cornbread" I mean "follow directions on the Jiffy box") but I was what I like to call FAMISHED and felt that cooking cornbread would take far too long. (And by "far too long" I mean "9 to 13 minutes").

5. Watched Oprah to see Jerry Seinfeld's wife (random) share some easy recipes "for normal people" which involved stuffing a whole chicken with lemon and rosemary and then tying the chicken's legs together with string. Guess I'm not normal.

6. Ate the food with my husband while watching Biggest Loser.

7. Did some Pilates while watching the Biggest Loser.

8. Talked to my friend Liz on gmail chat.

9. Sent out the weekly prayer request mass email for our Sunday School class.

10. Attempted to write a blog post.

11. Deleted the above-referenced blog post.

12. Hit the "Wrinkle Care" button on my dryer to take care of the clothing I failed to remove from the dryer last night.

13. Folded and put away the above-referenced clothing.

14. Dishes, yo.

15. Cleaned the countertops.

16. Sat my booty down on the couch and decided to stop trying to be creative with the blog and just start typing and see what happens.

17. Blogged while watching the news.

18. I am not at peace with leaving a list on an odd number so this is number 18 just because.

I do hope you enjoyed this post since it took 8 tries to come to fruition.

Also, Jennifer, I saw your comment in my last post. Tim Crane is... well that's a different story for a different day. Perhaps I'll write a blog about it. But for now, it's a mystery...

Sunday, October 24, 2010

I Made It

I could write a month's worth of blog posts about the last 4 days.

But I won't do that.

I'll just say the following things:

Not a whole lot of sleep. At all. But it was a whole lot of fun. I held a 4 month old chubby baby girl in my arms while eating a tortilla from Taco C dipped in queso and drinking a Diet Coke. IT WAS BLISS. Also, after having 3 babies under the age of 2 in my home all weekend I've learned that our humble abode is not what you would call "baby proof". It is more along the lines of "dangerous". When another little friend named Nate came over, he found some keys and then promptly headed over to plug the new-found keys into an electrical outlet. We stopped him but I about had a heart attack. Good times.

We had great food, great visit with Grant's family, snuggly babies walking around in pj's and big smiles, and lots of hugs and snuggles. We were so glad to have everyone here and we had a blast. Thanks to Chase, Ronda, Evan, Emily, Olivia, Mom and Dad for making the journey to Houston!

After church this morning, we had Five Guys with some friends and then Jen the Newlywed came on home and got in a comfy t-shirt and comfy pants that are not flattering which makes them more comfy and positioned herself on the couch and stayed there for a solid 3.5 hours.

My chill out nap time was disrupted by a call from Chase Fraud Alert which alerted us to the fact that a fellow Houstonian was having him or herself a fine little Sunday afternoon on our dime. I'm thinking it was a girl since she bought a WHOLE LOT OF SHOES at Memorial City Mall and then journeyed to a cosmetics store and then ate some yummy food at Cheddar's and then picked some things up at Walgreen's and then filled up 3 tanks of gas at a Chevron station. HEY, THANKS FOR THAT. IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE TRYING TO SAVE MONEY OR ANYTHING. YOU CAN JUST GO SHOPPING WITH MY MONEY. FINE BY ME.

Thankfully, Chase Fraud is great and will take care of all of this but it just bugs me that someone could do that. Urgh.

I've done a load of laundry. It is folded. It is folded in piles on my living room floor. At some point tonight i plan on putting it away but I can't promise that it is going to be anytime soon.

Okay, before I go, I have to ask...

How do we feel about this jacket?

It is from the Loft and it is plaid. I don't think I've ever had a plaid jacket. Aside from cute jeans, what else could i wear it with? Is it one of those pieces that I could only wear once every blue moon? Or could I wear it like every other week? THIS PROBABLY DOESN'T MATTER BECAUSE HOUSTON WILL NEVER EVER COOL DOWN EVER.

Jacket opinions, please.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

On My Plate

Let me first say that your love and support of Matthew McConaughey has been overwhelming. From your texts, emails, tweets, comments, and stopping me in real life to share your love for Matthew McConaughey... I have just been bombarded with the passion we share for MM.

The next time we vacation together, I will let him know.

So here is what is up with me:

For the next two nights, I will be helping record the "guide vocals" for the Christmas CD that our choir is distributing at the Christmas Celebration performances in December. The entire choir is recording this weekend, but a few of us are spending tonight and tomorrow night singing the guide vocals so the choir will have that in their ears when they record. It will be a very late night and will include very much coffee.

Also, I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS PART, the family is coming in this weekend! Grant's parents, brother, sister-in-law, and the three kiddos are coming to spend the weekend with us! Chase, Ronda and the babies are staying at our house and I am so excited. Olivia is 4 months old now which is one of my very most favorite ages and I will snuggle her all weekend! Being that I will have been at church till 11:00 Wednesday and Thursday of this week, I am certain that when the family arrives Grant and I will look like this:

Because that is pretty much how we look all the time. I don't see why this week would look any different.

Last night was also super fun. I went to the Beth Moore Bible study and learned some amazing stuff... and Christy Nockels sang which was phenomenal.... AND i got to see these lovely ladies

(as well as about 60 other people that I love dearly) and I came home very happy.

And hungry.

Which is why breakfast tacos are on my plate.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

The Spontaneous Matthew McConaughey Weekend

So the last few weeks/months I have been a little bit STRESSED. And even when I'm not stressed out, I'm busy. I'm not relaxed.
And I feel like my husband has been noticing. I'm not sure how he noticed. I've been so quiet and subtle about my stress.
So Friday was a glorious day. Around 2:00, Grant called me at work. He asked me what we had going on this weekend. After I told him that most of the things I was obligated to were to happen on Sunday, he said these words: "Do you wanna get away with me this weekend?".
I think he knew he needed to remove me from the situation.
So he got to searchin on the google and found somewhere to take me.
We drove two hours away to the Hyatt Lost Pines Resort in Bastrop, Texas.
We are going to sell our house, quit our jobs and move there.
Me love it.
Moxie got to come with us since the hotel is doggy friendly. Everything was just beautiful. So Texan and quiet and in the country. It has a spa, a golf course, a big pool, lazy river, gardens, restaurants, bike trails, horseback riding, and all kinds of family fun. For those of you with kids, I HIGHLY recommend this for you. So many activities for kids and adults.... on Saturday night we walked out to the park and saw 50 kids sprawled out on blankets, eating freshly roasted s'mores and watching Harry Potter on the big screen. Hotel staff walked around handing out popcorn. It was a beautiful starry night.

On Friday night we stayed in a beautiful, king suite. I had a really, really good night's sleep. I thanked the Lord (and my husband too) for giving us the ability to take such a spontaneous trip that brought so much rejuvenation.

Since our stay was so last minute, we only got to stay in the fancy suite for one night. The second night we moved to a room with 2 queen beds. All I cared about is the fact that the new room still had that big, comfy robe that I lived in for 48 hours. I LOVE ROBES.
Saturday we slept in and had breakfast. We took a bike ride around the property... took walks and enjoyed the view along the Colorado River.

Then Grant played the golf and I had some ME TIME in my room.
It involved:
All in a big comfy robe.
Okay, here's where this gets good.
I was sitting on my balcony, enjoying some magazines and a good cup of coffee.

Moxie and I were having an excellent time.

I heard string music. I looked to the right and saw a wedding. "How perfect!", I thought. I'm enjoying my me time on a beautiful day while listening to live classical music.
People were walking up the sidewalk in front of my balcony and being told by hotel security that they needed to walk elsewhere during the wedding ceremony. (I'd like to take this moment to address the fact that alot of people seemed irritated that they had to walk a different direction. The bride doesn't want your bathing suited flip-flopped children and your big smelly poodle walking behind her altar. GO THE OTHER WAY).
So I'm sittin there and I see a golf cart zip up towards the ceremony. I see the hotel security lift his hand and tell the driver that he needs to go the other way.

Then I heard his voice, "Oh, okay, a wedding, huh? Alright, alright, alright, now what's the best way to get out of here?"

I know that voice. I KNOW THAT VOICE. And I know that girl in the golf cart with him. I know her from People magazine. WHERE IS MY CAMERA, THAT IS MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY!!!

Matthew and his girlfriend Camila.
And this is them driving away.

I then heard the door to the room below me open, and I heard a woman say "I swear to God, Brett it was him!! IT WAS HIM!!"
I hollered down that she was correct. And that I had photographic evidence.
Nothing brings people together like celebrity sightings.

After I saw him, I went inside and saw Fool's Gold on TV, starring my golf cart friend. Following that was Failure to Launch. I wanted to walk over to his room (I knew which one it was) and say HEY, YOU ARE ON THE TV. LET'S WATCH IT TOGETHER!

I think we would've had fun.

This morning, when we left the resort, we walked by Camila and the two children, Levi and Vida, playing outside. Levi looks soooo much like his daddy.

So we're home now.
I feel relaxed.


Tuesday, October 12, 2010

I'm Feeling Chatty Which Is A Totally New Experience For Me

As referenced in my previous post, I'm feeling sicky lately.

However, I have far too much to do so I'm just ignoring the sickness and powering through.

I'd also like to mention that this nightly thing that's been happening where I wake up at 4:17am has got to stop. There is no reason for me to be awake at that hour and I'd like for it to not happen anymore.

My mom is a gem. She is on her way over here right now to bring me an extra crock pot since I'm having a party. She's also bringing me some fall decor since I've only been a home owner for 10 months and I don't own much in the autumn category. She knows that it's important for a fall party to have fall decor. She's a good woman.

I'm watching Biggest Loser right now and therefore I hold my 5lb dumbbells in my hand while I sit here on the couch. It makes me feel better.

Today someone in the office was taking a video of me with their cellphone and I thought she was taking a picture so I just sat there frozen with this goofy look on my face for a good ten seconds until I realized that she was taking a video. I felt super cool.

We celebrated bosses day at the office today since the bosses will be out of town on actual bosses day. We gave them a chocolate cake with a cherry on top. The girls and I wrote "Please Don't Fire Us" on the cake.

Today Grant emailed me and asked me to let him know what weekends are free in the next few weeks. I went through my calendar from now till the end of 2010. Not one free weekend between now and then. And as the year comes to a close, my weekdays get busier and busier as well. It is realizations like this that make me want to crawl into bed and pull the covers over my head and stay there for a few hours or months.

Bob from the Biggest Loser just told the contestants that he thinks that the food in your home should have a shelf life of no longer than two weeks. Um, what about my rice and pasta and fritos and cereal and velveeta? WHAT ABOUT THE VELVEETA, BOB!? And the girl scout cookies?! Girl, please. He also just said that you need to have color on your plate. Um, yeah. I do. Macaroni and cheese is YELLOW. There's your color. Boo-yah.

Okay I'm gonna wrap this up.

Peace out. Eat something yellow or beige. That's my health tip for the day. You're welcome.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Exhausted to the 12th Degree

I haven't written a blog post in a week.

I've tried on several occasions but I've failed. I would sit down to write and get about a paragraph out and then I realized I have nothing else to say that is of any interest to anyone, including myself.

I've been walking around like a zombie for the last week. Zombie may be an exaggeration. I've been walking around like a dead person for the last week.

Nothing bad is happening, it's just that alot is HAPPENING, period. I have work related obligations and family functions and church responsibilities and exercising and cleaning house and making meals and cheering Grant on at a golf tournament that was MUCH HOTTER than I thought it would be. (By the way, he did GREAT at his first "real" tournament. Didn't make the Sunday cut but he had a great performance!). Yesterday I spent 8 hours at church for a variety of reasons. I was supposed to go grocery shopping after the 8th hour but I called Grant and told him that I may fall over dead in HEB if I were to grocery shop. Which is saying something because, as previously stated, I am already a walking dead person as it is.

Among all the activities I've listed, I'd like for you to factor into the equation something I like to call DRUGS. Benadryl. Claritin. Alavert. Zyrtex. Tylenol. And on the 8th day, God made Tylenol PM. And it was good.

Ya see, about 10 days ago my ears and nose and head filled up with snot and I heard a voice somewhere deep inside say to me, "JEN! It's us!! Your allergies!! You didn't think you would make it through October without US did you?!? We're HERE! And we're here to STAY!".

I'd like to state for the record that I do realize that I just personified mucus and I realize that this absurd and disgusting and I blame the drug-induced state that I am currently in.

I also omitted mascara today as it is pointless.

I look beautiful.

Monday, October 4, 2010


As soon as I finish this blog post, I am starting page one of Her Daughter's Dream by Francine Rivers. This is the sequel to A Mother's Hope which I finished this summer and I have been anxiously awaiting the continued story of Marta and Hildie. I can't wait to start it! But first I am going to share with you people what is going on in my life currently.

Around the House:

As referenced in my previous post, there are alot of fall happenings going on around here. Lots of gourds and pumpkins and Wall Flowers from Bath & Body Works in the "Sweet Cinnamon Pumpkin" scent. There was also alot of fall cleaning this weekend. And alot of laundry. I feel like a new woman.

At work:

I'm busy busy busy all the time. My job description is ever expanding. The end.

At church:

Oooh fall is a busy season at church, is it not? This coming Sunday the Kids Choir that I help with is singing in all 3 services so we have a very busy weekend coming up. I'm also rehearsing with the adult choir at church to perform in the big Christmas Celebration. We've been rehearsing since late August. But it is so fun and I am such a choir nerd. Our Sunday school class is also quite active and I'm hosting a girls' night here at my house in a few weeks. We will also be in costumes. I'm thinking about wearing a blonde wig and an orange jumpsuit. I'd be Lindsay Lohan.
In Houston:

The weather makes me want to burst into a Disney-style song that I've titled "The WEATHER makes me SING with GLEE and dance around and LEAP with GLEE and sing a song with HARMONY and spin and twirl I'M SO HAPPY!!". It's an excellent song. A work in progress. GRANT LOVES IT. I'm sorry but I just start behaving strangely when it dips below 80 degrees. Just so you know.

With Grant:

Gosh, I love him. And he gets cuter and cuter all the time. And funnier. He makes me laugh. Alot. I'm also super proud of him since he made the cut for the Houston Amateur Golf tournament. It's happening this weekend. I'm going to watch him play. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO WEAR. I just can't pull off sporty y'all. I can't do it.

In Regards to Food:

I have a big bowl of fruit on my counter right now and my goal is to finish it by Friday. I'm not sure if I can do that. I can tell you with 100% certainty that I could finish off a bag of chips in 30 minutes. Grant opened a bag of chips earlier and then left it by me. I hollered out to him "I NEED YOU TO GET THESE CHIPS AWAY FROM ME!! I WILL EAT THEM. ALL OF THEM" so he rushed back and hid them. Sigh of relief. I am still thinking about them. But yeah, I'm not making any promises about the fruit.

In Regards to Fitness:

Thanks to a tip from my friend Jessica, I am now super obsessed with Pilates. I do it everyday. My U-verse has a channel on OnDemand called Exercise TV that has short workouts on them. I'm loving it and I really really feel it working. I am on my way to getting toned. As long as the chips stay away. I heart carbs.

What's Happening on the Television:

Well, it finally happened. For over a year now we've been playing catch-up with How I Met Your Mother. As of last night, we caught up with the season DVD's and tonight we watched the show on the night it aired for the first time. It feels so good to be caught up! Otherwise, I'm watching alot of Hoarders which has given me a new-found motivation to keep my house in utter perfection. Those people are wacky. And they have a few cats.

Other things I want to share:

I've really been hearing alot about OBEDIENCE lately. Whether I'm reading a book, listening to the radio, sitting in church or praying, I'm getting a strong message that I need to obey. Pastor Gregg said this Sunday that "50% obedience is called disobedience". GOOD STUFF. Anyways, last night I was reading a book by Elisabeth Elliot called Be Still My Soul and there was a nugget that overwhelmed me. I read it three times and then underlined it and then I starred it and then I highlighted it and then I drew arrows by it and then I put a post-it note in the page. Okay I'm exaggerating but I LOVE IT. She said:

"What a joy it is to obey this Lord, who provides us with His Spirit to counsel and empower us and who ensures that everything that happens to us, even the cyclone that brings nothing but destruction, has come through the hedge of his love before it reaches us". -Elisabeth Elliot

Alright, dear blog readers. Wherever you are. Whoever you are. I'm off to read my book.

Friday, October 1, 2010


Today is October 1st. This is a very happy day for me.

Why is it a happy day?

It's a happy day because it's the start of fall. COOLER WEATHER.

I get to start wearing clothes that look cute on me, which is a stark contrast from the summer clothes that look ridiculous on me. Short, squatty, ash white legs sprinkled with cellulite don't look so good in shorts.

Candles that smell like fall make my heart happy.

I went to Garden Ridge last night and bought $35 worth of fall decor for my home.

Now, fall is not my favorite season. WINTER is my favorite season.

But I love the fall because it is the lead in to winter.

It opens the door.

Houston girls make me laugh. We've been wearing summer clothes since March and now that the temperature has dropped below 90 degrees, we're busting out our leather boots, tweed blazers, and suede jackets. We're a tad eager.

I was tempted to start a fire in the fireplace the other night.

I bought some gourds. I put them on the mantel.

Grant doesn't understand the gourds.

The other thing I love about October is that sometime in the not-so-distant future we get to have an extra hour of sleep.

I only wish Daylight Saving's fell on a work day.


This is the most well written blog post in the history of Jen the Newlywed. So much logic. Such a great flow. So much structure.