Thursday, November 6, 2014

Getting Passport: Might Possibly Travel

I stood in my closet this morning, browsing my tops and trying to decide which shirt had a neckline that I won't regret in 10 years. Why? Because I took passport photos today. And a passport is good for a decade. What hair style and neckline will I not regret in 10 years? It's hard to say. If you told the 20 year old version of me that I would wear jeans other than bootcut in a decade, and that the jeans I would wear would accentuate all the wrong things and make me more hyper aware of how squatty I am and how wide my hips have become, I wouldn't have believed you. And, for the record, I think I'm going to get a petition going to bring the bootcuts back and rid the universe of the skinny jeans. It's time for them to go.

Anyways, I did go to a post office today and a very nice lady administered my passport application process and made me raise my right hand and take an oath and that made me very nervous all of a sudden.

Is this photo a true likeness of you? I don't know, I'm wearing a lot of makeup. When I woke up I looked a heck of a lot worse than this.

Are all of the answers in this application true and accurate? Maybe. You already made me change one answer because I said I am 5ft 2 inches AS I HAVE SAID FOR THE LAST 12 YEARS and you corrected me and informed me that I am 5ft 1 inches and so I am just really not sure about anything anymore.

The last time I applied for a passport, I was 14 years old. I was going to Italy on a choir trip and I had braces and lets just say I'm glad that photo is no longer a part of my national security record. The next time I traveled outside of the United States was on a cruise and they didn't make me have a current passport for that, and then the next time was on my honeymoon in 2006 and we went to Puerto Rico which is part of U.S. territory so I didn't have to have one then, either.

Since then, we've traveled to Florida and California and Oregon and New York and lots of fun places, but we've kept it domestic. So where am I going now, you're asking? Why do I need a passport?

Get this: I have no travel plans.

Let me break it down. Grant and I are not long term planners. We're more like 60 day planners. And I don't have a passport. So what if we want to go somewhere? We can't he will say to me. You don't have a passport.

Well guess what? I do now! BOO YAH!

Also, Ellie is at school today so I could apply and not have a toddler climbing up my leg. Ellie is especially mad at me today because I made her take off her pajamas and then I also refused to let her carry her GIANT PINK CASTLE into the car with us today. Clearly I am an out of control dictator.

Anyways, this is the top I chose. Also, the lady who took the photo kept telling me multiple times to get my hair out of my face. The side bangs were not acceptable. Apparently the U.S. Department of State needs everyone's foreheads to look as large as possible.

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